I need you to understand what I'm not saying to you.

She sat with her leg tucked underneath her and shoulders hunched, listening to the fan whir and shivering slightly. Outside, the sun set and cars passed and somewhere on the main street, moments followed each other like ants busy with living. Her forehead was furrowed like the thoughts inside her head; creased and not necessarily continuous. Memories like photos and videos ran through her head - buffering, disjointed and repeating.

Am I making this harder for myself?

His face, watching her with caring, unfathomable eyes - all she could see in her mind. But she didn't know what he was thinking, nor did he know her thoughts. She didn't know what he was doing now and whether he was thinking of her and really, she wasn't sure she wanted to know.

Was she?

Her tea was now lukewarm and she could hear her sister moving things in her room.


Perhaps this wasn't worth sharing.